THE WORLD OWES YOU NOTHING: WHY YOUR LIFE IS UP TO YOU

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“Your life: whatever comes of it is up to you.”


You want  something in life, you go for it. No one is going to give it to you and won’t care if you ever have it. So it’s your job to go into the world and make your own luck. Now, I could sit here and go through all the stories of how some people have it hard. Yet when it’s all said and done, everyone has something on their plate. And the world is just not interested in caring about whatever it is you’re going through in life. So where does that leave people who don’t have direction? It leaves them with their hands in the air. Because as an adult, you have to figure your life out.

Hey, easier said than done right? Well, in so many cases it’s actually wrong. I am in my late 20’s; actually I should just say thirty years of age by now. And I watch people my age go to the clubs and enjoy their lives. Yet I sit inside of a computer lab, typing away. Trying to come up with my next blog topic, my next screenplay idea, my next book, or my next anything that will make me a better writer. Meanwhile, so many guys my age do nothing. I don’t understand it, I just don’t. To me, my life is not moving as fast as I thought it would. So, in the moment, I feel like I am being just as unproductive as them. My life could turn out to be a dud just like the guy who sits around and does nothing.

And what’s scary, is that I could never achieve anything remotely close to the success I want in life. But that’s just life; there is no guarantee of making a living in society. I could put my life into my work and fail. But so many can’t stomach the idea of putting their all into something and it not pan out. They expect something to happen. They might ask, “How much time should I dedicate to doing this or that?” Or they’ll say, “So if I do everything you just said will it make me successful?” And real answer is, who knows. You have no clue what might transpire, but that’s actually what’s good about this roller coaster ride we call life. You might not even try that hard and win, or work your ass off and lose. There is no guarantee and no one owes you anything.

Because in the end, your life is whatever you make it. No one has to make things happen for you, that’s your job. Yes, there may be people who give you an opportunity along the way, but it’s not owed to you. You take it for what it’s worth and keep going. Because win or lose, your success in life will ultimately come down to how much you have prepared. And for those that haven’t prepared, it will show in their lives.


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THE NOW: WHY DON’T SOME RECOGNIZE THE GRIND

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“Put the work in, and you’ll understand how you get there.”


No matter who it is, whether in the public eye or some average man or woman, dealing with the downsides of success is real. And when I say the downsides, I am referring to the people who try to make you feel some sort of penalty because you’ve made something of yourself. The people who see what you do as trivial. Something that can be easily accomplished with just a few quick steps. But what they don’t know is that you’ve been cultivating your craft in whatever you’ve been doing for quite some time. Toiling for years while everyone else was living their lives. So was it about your come up that make some express disdain?

One of the reasons is that it further magnifies how much they have wasted their own lives. If you start working toward your goals at age 21 or 22, and become very financially set by the age of 30/31, they can’t understand. They stand on the side trying to piece together what it was that set you over the top. Almost like it was this one thing you did that made you pop in your career. Notice I said started at age 22 and now you’re 30, 31, or even 32 years action, active, activityof age. All that time in between was the struggle years. The years that while others were enjoying their youth in their twenties, you were working. And now they see you, and it sets in how much time they’ve spent just sitting around. Now it’s hard to get in the game because you now know what could have been if you just buckled down initially.

But see, there’s more, there’s more that goes into people not being able to understand the grind. Another reason has to do with the cognitive abilities of the person pursuing their goals. The average person’s IQ is around 110, so some have a hard time believing we have these people with a 150, 160, or Midsection of Man Holding Hands over White Backgroundeven 200 IQ. And that biological factor is ingrained in some people where their brain processes information differently. They are able to wrap their minds around mathematics, science, sociology, business, and any other facet of productivity in society. And explaining the way their brains work is tough because how do you really explain why your mind understands what it does. No one can wrap their mind around their mind. It’s that certain aspects of life make sense to them and they run with it.

Which leads me into my next reason why some people can’t recognize the grind. The idea of trying and failing is something that eludes them. I myself am a person that is able to take my failure in stride and move on to create better things. Some sit on the side and say what you shouldn’t do, but they’re only projecting their feelings on to you. They’re telling you don’t do it, take it from someone whose been down the road. But what they’re actually saying is it didn’t work for me and I’m smarter than you. So I know it won’t work for you. Your ability to do something further they can’t makes them feel mundane and unaccomplished. Your potential success makes them feel bitter from not achieving their own goals out of life.

In the end, as with the people who respect your come up there will be the ones downing your come up. Instead of taking the blueprint and using it as a basic template to build something for themselves, they find any reason to say how it won’t work. And you can’t get through to these people because achievement, adventure, bravethey are looking for someone to subscribe to their bullshit. But why would I subscribe to your ideology if it’s gotten you nowhere. So I say to all successful people or those embarking on your journey keep working. Like Denzel Washington stated in a speech he gave at the NAACP Image Awards. “Keeping moving, keep growing, keep learning: see you at work.”


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THE POWER OF BROKE: EXERCISING YOUR ABILITY TO FIND OPPORTUNITY WHERE OTHERS CAN’T

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“Making yourself appear to have it, without really spending it.”


The above photo is of clothing co-founder Daymond Jones of the company FUBU and now co-host on ABC’s Shark Tank. He recently wrote a book entitled, “The Power of Broke.” The book opens people up to opportunities of making a living without having to believe they needed to be born into wealth. In reality, Jones himself was not born into wealth. He and a close group of friend built their business from scratch selling hats. The hats weren’t that great initially, but they kept on going. Eventually, FUBU became a major clothing brand. The brand was making at it’s height $300 million plus globally. The brand today is not what it was during that time period, yet Daymond has gone off to broker major business deals.

Now, what can the average person do, to build themselves, and practice their own power of broke? One way that the average Joe can exercise the power of broke is to cut back on spending more money, by purchasing products just as nice, but at a lower cost. One decision I make is buying shoes on Amazon from small retail stores on the internet. They are in the range of $30 – $50 per pair. I would usually go to the mall and purchase sneakers for $100 – $150 a pair. I have even bought clothing on the internet that is cheaper than buying in the store. I take my money that I would use for buying more and put it toward my goals. What else could this work in your life?

Another way of practicing the power of broke besides cutting back on the purchases you make, is to realize the opportunities when others don’t see them. If you do come from a humble background, you are in a very interesting position whether you know it or not. Number one, there is nowhere to go but up. But also, because whatever you do is more than what you started with. So if you only make a few hundred dollars a month, it’s a few more than when you first started. You can’t look at it like, “Oh, that’s nothing.” But a few hundred dollars extra could pay for a utility or some other payment for the household.

The last power that Daymond talked about was the idea of getting a mentor. Which is tough for a lot of people because it requires reaching out asking for the help. No one wants to reach out for help and get rejected. So a lot of times we try to build by ourselves, when in reality no one has built any form of success alone. Having someone to guide you along is very crucial in your success. You see, in the end, it’s hard to exercise the power of broke because we want to keep up with others or not be looked at a certain way by others. Yet, part of power is not caring what others have to say. And once you are able to let go of that fear, then you’ll become better off as well.


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VISION BOARD: WHERE DO YOU SEE YOURSELF IN TIME

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“It’s not guaranteed to work, but keeps you on track.”


We all close our eyes and contemplate where we would like to see ourselves in the future. Now getting to that point is a lot harder than the vision. So what do we have to do, we have to create a vision board for where we would like to see ourselves in the future. Once again, writing down the visions is quite simple, but getting to the point where you are living out the vision is difficult. So why even create a vision board? If it’s not some sure fire guarantee, what’s the purpose of doing so. The purpose is that it keeps you on track toward the goal in life you are seeking to accomplish.

Let’s say you would like to run your own business. This is where vision boards are very necessary. Simply because you have to project outward how well your business could potentially perform. So you have no other choice Close-up of Text on Woodbut to think of the future when doing so. You have to calculate projections 3 – 6 months, 6 – 12 months, and even years out. If you your business is in order then you’re going to reach your visions. And that’s how you accomplish your vision in business. Keep the business end in tact and moving forward, then your vision will formulate. But business is not the only vision one has in life.

What about the plans you have for buying a house. We have this image of a house in mind that we would like to purchase. But how are we going to attain that house that we want. One way to get that house is by first starting White Painted House Under Orange Skyout buying a smaller home. Invest in a starter, maybe a fixer-upper and work from there. You’re most likely not going to live in your dream house as your first residence unless you go pro in a sport at a young age. The average Joe will have to first buy a starter home. Or you might even have to buy a condo to start with until you build to the point where you have your dream house.

Another need to build yourself a vision board is in regards to paying off debts. We see ourselves being financially set by a certain age. But we don’t quite know how to get to that point in life. So how do we create ourselves aadministration, analytics, businessvision board for that time when we are debt free? One way is to set aside a certain amount of money that will be strictly used for paying off bills. Stick to this plan and you will still be young when you are done paying off your debts.

In the end, a vision board is very necessary in keeping yourself on track to where you want to be in life. There is still no guarantee, but if you don’t at least write it down and work at sticking to your goal, you will not get to it. You will have this vision, but getting there becomes tough or even impossible because there is no real direction. It’s just a vision. I have been on track with my own vision board for the past 7 years. I am giving myself 10 years to break into my career field. And with everyday that I awake, I see myself getting closer and closer to attaining my goals.


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GOING SOMEWHERE FEELING NOWHERE FAST: DO YOU EVER FEEL IN THE MOMENT YOU’RE NOT ACCOMPLISHING MUCH

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“It’s where you end not how you start.”


Ever get the feeling in life that you are pushing so hard, it feels like you are progressing. You wake up putting the work in, but you are not seeing the progress. Is it because you are not working hard enough or is it because the road to where you want to go is very long and hard? The life that we all want is right there in front of us, but we cannot see it because it is not in the now. And that is something that hurts us in life is the now. In the moment, we have such a hard time seeing the future. Especially if we are in a tough spot in life.

Putting in the work is very important, but if that’s what you are doing why is it so hard to see? It’s because of the society we live in today. We live in a very right now society. Meaning anything we want we can access it right now. And when you want a successful career, it is a long road, that you can not have in the now. The path is long and hard and sometimes you can’t see where you’re going because of all the work you are putting in now. For example, I am on my path to filmmaking and becoming a novelist. I see places I want to be, but there is a process and that process is long and hard. Meaning I have already started with my first short film. I saw any mistakes and have already looked to correct them for my next one. Yet, it still feels at times there is no movement.

Why does it feel that way? I work everyday with a lot of young people who are in the process of building their futures. Then again, you see they go out on the weekends, date, and travel, while I am working on writing and filmmaking. Which leads to another reason that road is difficult to navigate. When looking at your peers, you perceive them to be doing something that you are not doing. I have often worked in he computer lab and thought to myself, could I be doing what they’re doing. Then I come to my senses and realize their path is their path. Even as optimistic as myself, I have allowed such thoughts to intrude. But notice I said come to my senses. Which is something a lot of people don’t do. They allow themselves to be determined by others progress.

And this is evident because you’ll hear them say, “Not everybody can be you.” But that’s not the point is to be the other person. The only reason people look at others is because society holds up this image of what success looks like in the world. But the person who embodies that have chased it on their own, while you chase their embodiment saying, “I can’t be them.” Stop trying to be the society image and be what is out here for you. See, in the end, it is so difficult for people to step outside of what is expected of them. So when pursuing, you can’t see where you want to be because it may be not the norm of what everyone else wants you to do. We find it so hard to see ourselves in a certain position because we never want to put our all into something and it goes nowhere. But you will never know until you pursue.


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GARY V EFFECT: HOW ENTREPRENEURSHIP HAS GROWN IN POPULARITY IN RECENT YEARS

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“What’s hustle to you?”


The above animation is of CEO of Vayner Media Gary Vaynerchuk. He gained wide popularity over the internet for his Daily V and many other web content over YouTube. And since the launch of his popularity he has since been seen as a motivational speaker. Even though he doesn’t look at himself as motivational speaker, he has inspired a wide range of people to embark on their own business endeavors. His famous quotes are known throughout the web whether it’s him telling people to, “Get shit done,” or “Don’t watch three seasons of Lost, and then wonder why nothing is happening in your life.” Now, to be clear, Gary V is not the first person to motivate people to be entrepreneurs, yet he is one of the most popular.

What is it about what Gary says to people that resonates so deeply? Well, the most obvious reason he resonates with people is because of his success. He has taken people on a journey through his life as he has become successful over the years. It’s quite inspirational when you can look at a person’s transformation over the years and actually have video content to track the person. We always say that people had an easy ride, but when you can see the climb it makes that person much more appealing. But there is no success without the work put into the climb. And that is what brings me to my next reason why people connect to Gary.

He gives it to people straight, in a way that everyone can understand. Usually, people who give advice give these very generic answers. Answers that don’t have much substance. Or if they do have substance it requires you to buy their book or attend their seminar. Receiving free content that gives an insight into the world from a person who has taken the leap of faith into society is well worth listening to. So what is it; what has made people lean in the direction toward entrepreneurship? There are a few reasons as to why this could be happening in our society.

For starters, there are so many people in the world who hate their jobs. They wish they could be doing anything other than what they are doing at the moment. So opening a side business to make a little money outside of the daily grind is worth it. But mainly people have become attracted to entrepreneurship because the state of employment has shifted. So many people are out of work, and for those working you’re still barely able to sustain financially. Unlike the past generations, the millennial generation and beyond won’t work a job for 30 plus years and retire in that same place. In America today, working the same job for five years is a stretch.

So in the end, the allure of being an entrepreneur has people ready to dive right in. The only downside, is that most don’t have the stomach to deal with the adversity or daily fight of trying to make a living from absolutely nothing. Truth is, most will give up within their first year of pursuing. In the words of Gary V, “Most people are wired to lose and conform.” That’s life, and it will always be that way. But for the few who can stomach the grind, they make out on top financially and in happiness.


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HOLLA, WE WANT PRENUP! WE WANT PRENUP!

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“I love you, but can you sign something for me?”

How do you go about bringing this up to a spouse? “So sweetie, you I know love and want to spend the rest of my life with you.” “But before we go any further do you mind looking over some paperwork with me?” She replies, “Sure what is it a marital license, the mortgage for our new home, the will..” Then you interject, “No, the prenup (cough)! She says, “Hmm?” You say, “The prenuptial agreement.” And with a exclamatory reply she goes, “Prenup, what the hell for!”

GULP! What is the right way to introduce this into a relationship? How in one breathe do you speak love, then the next ask for signed documentation? Documentation which will protect your assets in the case of divorce. Well first you have to ask yourself why is such a document necessary for starters. It’s necessary because of the high divorce rates, that’s why.

In the United States today, the divorce is close to 65% after only 5 years of marriage. I don’t know about you, but knowing you may have to split assets with someone you’ve only been with for 5 years seems kind of unfair. If you were married for 25 years, or 30 years, or 40 years, then yes, but 5. The reason I say 25 years or more is because at least there was a long term investment into the relationship. The 5 year plan seems like more of a business exchange than a marriage.

And that is where the prenuptial agreement comes into play. Marriage has become an in and out business today in America. Meet someone whose financially stable, get your 5 years in, and see ya later. But if you’re a man without any money, than a woman has no interest. Now if you are a man of means, this could be somewhat of concern. So is the way to protecting yourself not succeeding and striving in life. Because think about, you work all these years and someone comes and goes, “I’m not happy.”

So what, my future should now be determined on if you’re happy or not. So if I am happy and you’re not, than I have to lose in life. So now you think to yourself, what’s the purpose in working hard in life. Why push if you’re not going to be able to reap the benefits of your labor? As a man, you work so that one day you can relax and enjoy the fruits of your hard work. But if you’re only working just to one day hand it all over why work at all. Divorce has become the reason to be a total loser.

Women say that it’s not fair, fine let’s flip it. As a woman, you make $100,000 a year, would you marry a $30,000 a year man. It’s hard to do so, why because even you know as a woman that is not a business smart decision. So if you’re not willing to give up anything you worked for, why are you so ready for us to do so? A woman goes, “You need to be at my level.” But how often do you go, “I need to be on his level.” It’s easy to talk love and marriage when you have a lot less to lose.

This is why when people who make a certain amount of income wed, they need to have these discussions. But asking your wife to sign a prenup when you are a construction worker, police officer, garbage truck driver, etc. can be tough. Her reply would be, “You don’t have anything to take.” “Why sign a prenup?” Well that’s where she’s wrong. These men in these job titles are the ones who need prenups the most. If you’re athlete with $50 million and your wife gets $20 – $25 million, then you’re still good. But if you make $35,000 and your wife gets $10,000 – $15,000, you could be in trouble financially.

Which brings me to the after affects of divorce. One of the leading indicators of poverty amongst men is divorce. Conversely the leading indicator of wealth amongst women is marriage. So now you can see why a prenuptial agreement conversation can be one of much debate. It’s still the come up of a woman in America, but the lose of wealth among men. Yet, marriage is not on the decline in this country.

Maybe marriage is still going strong, well getting married at least, because people want to believe. Everyone wants to believe those numbers will change with them. Everyone goes not my husband, not my wife. We have something special with each other. We have a bond that’s bigger than money. And that’s just it. We as humans know it can be a crap shoot, but want to believe that the person in our lives would never leave. Yet year after year, the divorce cases pile on the desk of attorneys.

It’s 65% today what, 80% in the future. No matter how you look at it, marriage is still a great union, but in today’s society we have no other option at times but to treat it as it is. A union whereas two people are pooling together finances to gauge how well this relationship will work. Which dwindles down to a business contract that is an investment into our future together.