THE WORLD OWES YOU NOTHING: WHY YOUR LIFE IS UP TO YOU

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“Your life: whatever comes of it is up to you.”


You want  something in life, you go for it. No one is going to give it to you and won’t care if you ever have it. So it’s your job to go into the world and make your own luck. Now, I could sit here and go through all the stories of how some people have it hard. Yet when it’s all said and done, everyone has something on their plate. And the world is just not interested in caring about whatever it is you’re going through in life. So where does that leave people who don’t have direction? It leaves them with their hands in the air. Because as an adult, you have to figure your life out.

Hey, easier said than done right? Well, in so many cases it’s actually wrong. I am in my late 20’s; actually I should just say thirty years of age by now. And I watch people my age go to the clubs and enjoy their lives. Yet I sit inside of a computer lab, typing away. Trying to come up with my next blog topic, my next screenplay idea, my next book, or my next anything that will make me a better writer. Meanwhile, so many guys my age do nothing. I don’t understand it, I just don’t. To me, my life is not moving as fast as I thought it would. So, in the moment, I feel like I am being just as unproductive as them. My life could turn out to be a dud just like the guy who sits around and does nothing.

And what’s scary, is that I could never achieve anything remotely close to the success I want in life. But that’s just life; there is no guarantee of making a living in society. I could put my life into my work and fail. But so many can’t stomach the idea of putting their all into something and it not pan out. They expect something to happen. They might ask, “How much time should I dedicate to doing this or that?” Or they’ll say, “So if I do everything you just said will it make me successful?” And real answer is, who knows. You have no clue what might transpire, but that’s actually what’s good about this roller coaster ride we call life. You might not even try that hard and win, or work your ass off and lose. There is no guarantee and no one owes you anything.

Because in the end, your life is whatever you make it. No one has to make things happen for you, that’s your job. Yes, there may be people who give you an opportunity along the way, but it’s not owed to you. You take it for what it’s worth and keep going. Because win or lose, your success in life will ultimately come down to how much you have prepared. And for those that haven’t prepared, it will show in their lives.


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DOUBTERS: WHY YOU ACTUALLY NEED THE HATERS IN YOUR LIFE

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“You will never make it, so why try?”


We’re always taught in our lives to surround ourselves with good people.  Place yourself around those going in the same direction as you. But what happens when all of that is attempted to be derailed by someone who wants to kill your dreams. That means you have to work that much harder to make it happen yourself. Those dream killers are the doubters who either out loud or silently told you it would never happen. They are the ones who it didn’t work for them, and don’t want it to work for you. Where does it come from; why do they need to feel the need to bring you down? And why do you actually in a way need these type of people in your life.

Doubters are people who for a number of reasons may not want to see you succeed in your career of interests. You have the first group of doubters that are the ones that will tell you try something else. They are flat out not interested in anything you do. They see you in the present state and can’t see past that point. You’re perceived by them as a slacker or loser. So they can’t get around the loser that is you. So to them you’re going to always be what your are. Another group of doubters are the people whose careers didn’t pan out so they have to tell you how much it won’t work for you. To them, they couldn’t make it and there is no way you’re better than them. So they just know you’ll fail in life. And if you do succeed, they’ll find the most negative stuff to say about you.

The third group of doubters are the people who have their success and don’t want you to surpass them. To them, you are a threat and must be stopped. But they are not going to just stop you, they’ll be overly negative. The goal is to get you to quit because a lot of times you work for them. They are comfortable with you under them and can’t stand you above where they think you should be. Kind of how comedians have come out recently after Kevin Hart. They were fine when he was below them, now he’s way above them, and now there is every reason to say he doesn’t deserve it. But the last group of doubters are the flat out hate group. They usually have no real discernible talent, and need to bring you down. Because your success further shows how much of their life was a waste. Especially if they remember when both of you were at the bottom. It shows how much time they’ve wasted in their lives.

Now, with all that I have stated, why do we need these doubters? Well, first and foremost they push us to be better. There is no motivation like people telling you you’re not good enough. You work overtime to prove them wrong. But I think the biggest reason we need doubters is to gain an insight into the human psyche. People who doubt you expose aspects of their personality. And not because of criticism; but hate. Criticizing someone is fine when you have a solution to make a situation better. But hate for the sake of hate let’s you in on who the criticizers are internally. And in the end that’s the just of doubters. They have their own internal workings going on. But how they see you and who you really are is totally different. As long as you have self-awareness, what they say has no hold.


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YOUR LIFE, YOUR PATH: HOW TO NAVIGATE YOUR WAY THROUGH ADULTHOOD

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“Navigating life can be so tough.”


Living in real time, becoming an adult is seen as such a stretch in life when you’re a young kid. I still remember the days when my mother would walk in the house from work. I would be sitting in front of the television as she walked through the door. She’d head straight into the bathroom and get changed into her joggers andWoman in White Shirt Sleeping on Gray Fabric Sofa t-shirt. Coming back into the living room, she’d sit onto the couch and start to watch television as well. In that space and time, I knew my day would come to embark on my own journey in life. Yet at the time, I didn’t seem to quite know where that journey would lead. I just knew after age eighteen I would be out into the world.

 

 

Upon leaving high school, I went off to undergraduate school out of state, then transferring back home at the end of the first semester. After returning back home, I still didn’t quite know what I wanted to do in life, yet the timeachievement, cap, celebration was still ticking. My senior year was approaching and I still didn’t know what I wanted to do. But, I did have plans of going off to graduate school after undergrad. And then, May of 2011 was the year I would graduate college. I walked across that stage just as my two sisters had done in the past. And it would be just a few months later that I would be moving on. Moving out to New York City to attend graduate school for my MBA.

Now, did I really want to go off and work for an organization. Not really, so why did I attend graduate school for my Masters Degree? Well, coming out of undergrad, I started to write my very first screenplay. It was entitled, “Wood Road,” and would later be changed to “Retribution.” Not realizing Image result for screenplayhow hard it would be to write, it took me two and a half years to complete. Why, well for starters I didn’t attend film school. And second, I was so discouraged, I quit the first time writing for about one and half years. I just didn’t think I was good enough. Yet, I kept coming back to the script, time and time again. My mind could not focus, unless I was thinking about the script. Then I came back to the script, and finished it.

As I was writing the script, I started to write down all these ideas I had for screenplays. And the more I wrote, the more I realized this is what I wanted Railroad Tracks in Cityto do in life. So at the age of 24 years going on 25, I made the conscious decision to pursue a career as a screenwriter/filmmaker. And here is where
the path to success becomes quite murky. Because as a writer, there is no real path to take in life. It’s not like leaving med school, taking up a residency at a hospital. Or leaving law school getting recruited into a firm. There is no real time limit, nor a real guarantee of it working. All I knew is that I was new to this, don’t know if I’ll succeed, but I like it.

And from that point of liking it, I continued to write. Even writing and shooting my first short film, self-publishing two books, and starting a blog site. At an age where a lot of people are hanging on weekends at the club or Asphalt Road Near Trees Under White Sky at Daytimefocusing on a monogamous relationships, I am producing film, writing my books, and contributing to a blog. What’s tough is that who knows if I’ll succeed. And that is the scary part. No one wants to work toward something just for it blow up in the their faces. We work hard with the hopes of things panning out. And as much as you’re taught that your best may not be good enough, it still doesn’t sink into the mind. Not until you actually fail.

And in the end, that’s the hardest part about life, is the failure. The majority of people go to work, get their checks every two weeks, and live like this for life until retirement. Yet when you step outside that box and try something, you don’t want to be the one people laugh at for failing. You don’t want to Person Doing Cliff Diving during Daytimebe the one people said I told you so. What’s funny is that sometimes those people as well as others secretly wish they were you at times. Throwing yourself off a cliff; taking that leap of faith. But the way I see it, it’s better to jump and see what happens, than to never jump and wonder what could have been.


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EMPLOYMENT WOES: WHAT TO DO IF YOU HATE YOUR JOB

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“Find something else and fast.”


Ever get the feeling like the job you’re working is a road leading to nowhere? That feeling you get when you’ve been somewhere for far too long. That feeling when you need a change of scenery. That feeling where everyone’s face is starting to become too familiar and you need something new. Where the pay is just not good enough. A place where the supervisors are just far too difficult to work for everyday. These are all the feelings of someone who is in dire need of a new job. So what must you do to combat your situation? Well, for starters, you have to put yourself in the right mind frame.

And what does that mean to put yourself in the right mind frame? That means to try not to get too down on yourself. This will create anxiety and depression within, and cause you to not even attempt to do better with your life. You’ll come home everyday, with the thought of hating your job, just to go to sleep and come back to work the next day. Which leads me into the next steps you must take. Putting yourself in the know of whatever it is you want to attain in this world. So many people might hear me say the know. And they’ll say in return, “What the hell is the know?” And the know is whatever it is your’re seeking to have that you already don’t have in life. Sounds difficult, it is if you are not in the right mind frame or lack self-awareness to put yourself in the know.

For example, if you are an Administrative Assistant and want to become an Executive Assistant, what steps do you take. Well, in society today, we have so much access to so much information, that libraries have become obsolete. Now, you can Google anything you want to learn and actually learn it. Some may say, I don’t have access to a computer. And you would be wrong, it’s called a cell phone. For me, I want a career as a writer, so I started this WordPpress Blog. And there are days I could not get to a computer, and typed out my blog posts from my cell phone. When you want something you’ll find a way.

I heard a motivational speaker tell a girl on a talk show that your dreams are not important to you. Because if I told you to meet me at a certain location and time to be there; where $10,000 was awaiting you’ll be there. He said that’s why procrastination is not real. It’s just your dreams are not important to you. Which brings me to the next step that people need to take, and that is chase your dreams not someone else’s dreams. I heard radio host of The Breakfast Club, Charlamagne tha God say “F” your dreams if it’s not your dream. At first it sound aggressive and rude, but looking closer it made sense through his explanation. Because usually our dreams are from what someone else’s success has become. And it’s usually not our dream.

And that’s what it is all about in the end. Being in the right mind frame, putting yourself in the know of what you want, then executing your dream not another person’s dream. But even with my explanation, there are people who will still look over the information. They will remain sleep, and ignore all of what you have said to them. And those are the people who never find there way, and become stuck in life, never accomplishing anything.


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MEDIOCRITY IS WINNING: HOW AIMING LOW “IS” AIMING HIGH IN TODAY’S SOCIETY

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“We celebrate taking the “L” yet we don’t respect the “L.”


Hard work and determination has been the name of the game forever in American society. But have we finally come to a point where mediocrity is the new name of the game? Are we finally starting to see the dumbing down of a generation? I was listening to an episode of the radio program talk show The Breakfast Club. And music producer Rico Love was discussing the state of music in the industry. And the conversation was brought up regarding mediocrity and why bad music is selling. There is a lack of respect for the craft and people have a hard time patronizing something they don’t see as attainable. So people are comfortable with not winning or being great.

Is there some truth to that assessment regarding music? Or is there something bigger going on in our society? In my opinion, it’s not just music, there is a societal shift as well. You watch it in sports, how everybody gets a trophy. It’s almost as if we are now living in a world where if I can’t wrap my mind around something that is greatness, it’s dumb. So much so, you have thinkers dumbing themselves down for the sake of fitting into the popularity of the dumb culture. Instead of them saying no, that’s bad, this is great. And that is a problem in our society because it has bigger ramifications.

For example, other countries are teaching their children to strive for greatness, yet America has this new everyone is special mindset. So what you will notice is more kids who are winning outside of America. But also, the immigrants who are coming in will start to dominate over those whose families have been here longer. Even if you never attain that greatness, you should want to reach those great heights. But now, it’s almost like a punishment for anyone who thinks in this mind frame. Now here is the reality of the mind frame when looking at how we are promoting the everyone gets a trophy and dumbing of a society.

In reality, life is about taking “L’s” and taking “W’s.” Life really is about winning and losing, and the people telling you it’s not are the real people pushing to win. I hate how athletes and entertainers tell young people life is not all about winning, when they have to win to keep their jobs. And mediocrity will not be taken lightly and you will lose your job. Everything is the “W” in the real world, everything. But there is a difference between taking an “L” and actually being a loser. Everyone loses, but losers are the ones that give up and never try again.

In the end, people who are performing well consistently have been taking these hits for some apparent reason. People look at them and go, I can’t attain that, so I’ll be this guy over here whose not as great. I see it with the president; where people have said why do I need a resume to do this, the president doesn’t have political experience. And that is something in life I never have done. Look at someone I see as mediocre and go they don’t have it, why should I. If you feel someone else is mediocre, why not try to be above mediocrity. Because the work to be better is too much, and it’s comforting and easy to be less than average, must less great.


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THE NOW: WHY DON’T SOME RECOGNIZE THE GRIND

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“Put the work in, and you’ll understand how you get there.”


No matter who it is, whether in the public eye or some average man or woman, dealing with the downsides of success is real. And when I say the downsides, I am referring to the people who try to make you feel some sort of penalty because you’ve made something of yourself. The people who see what you do as trivial. Something that can be easily accomplished with just a few quick steps. But what they don’t know is that you’ve been cultivating your craft in whatever you’ve been doing for quite some time. Toiling for years while everyone else was living their lives. So was it about your come up that make some express disdain?

One of the reasons is that it further magnifies how much they have wasted their own lives. If you start working toward your goals at age 21 or 22, and become very financially set by the age of 30/31, they can’t understand. They stand on the side trying to piece together what it was that set you over the top. Almost like it was this one thing you did that made you pop in your career. Notice I said started at age 22 and now you’re 30, 31, or even 32 years action, active, activityof age. All that time in between was the struggle years. The years that while others were enjoying their youth in their twenties, you were working. And now they see you, and it sets in how much time they’ve spent just sitting around. Now it’s hard to get in the game because you now know what could have been if you just buckled down initially.

But see, there’s more, there’s more that goes into people not being able to understand the grind. Another reason has to do with the cognitive abilities of the person pursuing their goals. The average person’s IQ is around 110, so some have a hard time believing we have these people with a 150, 160, or Midsection of Man Holding Hands over White Backgroundeven 200 IQ. And that biological factor is ingrained in some people where their brain processes information differently. They are able to wrap their minds around mathematics, science, sociology, business, and any other facet of productivity in society. And explaining the way their brains work is tough because how do you really explain why your mind understands what it does. No one can wrap their mind around their mind. It’s that certain aspects of life make sense to them and they run with it.

Which leads me into my next reason why some people can’t recognize the grind. The idea of trying and failing is something that eludes them. I myself am a person that is able to take my failure in stride and move on to create better things. Some sit on the side and say what you shouldn’t do, but they’re only projecting their feelings on to you. They’re telling you don’t do it, take it from someone whose been down the road. But what they’re actually saying is it didn’t work for me and I’m smarter than you. So I know it won’t work for you. Your ability to do something further they can’t makes them feel mundane and unaccomplished. Your potential success makes them feel bitter from not achieving their own goals out of life.

In the end, as with the people who respect your come up there will be the ones downing your come up. Instead of taking the blueprint and using it as a basic template to build something for themselves, they find any reason to say how it won’t work. And you can’t get through to these people because achievement, adventure, bravethey are looking for someone to subscribe to their bullshit. But why would I subscribe to your ideology if it’s gotten you nowhere. So I say to all successful people or those embarking on your journey keep working. Like Denzel Washington stated in a speech he gave at the NAACP Image Awards. “Keeping moving, keep growing, keep learning: see you at work.”


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THE POWER OF BROKE: EXERCISING YOUR ABILITY TO FIND OPPORTUNITY WHERE OTHERS CAN’T

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“Making yourself appear to have it, without really spending it.”


The above photo is of clothing co-founder Daymond Jones of the company FUBU and now co-host on ABC’s Shark Tank. He recently wrote a book entitled, “The Power of Broke.” The book opens people up to opportunities of making a living without having to believe they needed to be born into wealth. In reality, Jones himself was not born into wealth. He and a close group of friend built their business from scratch selling hats. The hats weren’t that great initially, but they kept on going. Eventually, FUBU became a major clothing brand. The brand was making at it’s height $300 million plus globally. The brand today is not what it was during that time period, yet Daymond has gone off to broker major business deals.

Now, what can the average person do, to build themselves, and practice their own power of broke? One way that the average Joe can exercise the power of broke is to cut back on spending more money, by purchasing products just as nice, but at a lower cost. One decision I make is buying shoes on Amazon from small retail stores on the internet. They are in the range of $30 – $50 per pair. I would usually go to the mall and purchase sneakers for $100 – $150 a pair. I have even bought clothing on the internet that is cheaper than buying in the store. I take my money that I would use for buying more and put it toward my goals. What else could this work in your life?

Another way of practicing the power of broke besides cutting back on the purchases you make, is to realize the opportunities when others don’t see them. If you do come from a humble background, you are in a very interesting position whether you know it or not. Number one, there is nowhere to go but up. But also, because whatever you do is more than what you started with. So if you only make a few hundred dollars a month, it’s a few more than when you first started. You can’t look at it like, “Oh, that’s nothing.” But a few hundred dollars extra could pay for a utility or some other payment for the household.

The last power that Daymond talked about was the idea of getting a mentor. Which is tough for a lot of people because it requires reaching out asking for the help. No one wants to reach out for help and get rejected. So a lot of times we try to build by ourselves, when in reality no one has built any form of success alone. Having someone to guide you along is very crucial in your success. You see, in the end, it’s hard to exercise the power of broke because we want to keep up with others or not be looked at a certain way by others. Yet, part of power is not caring what others have to say. And once you are able to let go of that fear, then you’ll become better off as well.


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